The AX Report 2001
by Xoth, Master of Black Magic
Day 2: Back in the Groove
It was a slow morning for us. We gradually dragged ourselves out of bed or sleeping bag and waited our turn for the bathroom. While waiting, we decided to watch anime the only way we could: on Arty’s computer. Unfortunately, he did not have Kodocha (at least, not that we watched), which, I can attest, is one of the best wake-up animes ever. But he did show us the first few episodes of the anime Gate Keepers. From the little I’ve seen, it looks like a standard sci-fi/action anime. The year is 1969, and Japan is under attack from evil alien forces. Who will protect humankind from these hostile invaders and save the world? Japanese schoolchildren with supernatural powers, of course! Yeah, it doesn’t sound too compelling from this very vague description, but, hey, I found it entertaining, a good blend of badguy ass-kicking and slapstick comedy. Anyways, there’s a few highly informative Gate Keepers websites out there, so search for them if you want more a detailed synopsis.
Of course, no one can start the day off right without a
couple rounds of DDR. So once again we fired up Arty’s portable and once
again began stomping the pads into paste. However, while fooling around a
bit, we made a few strange discoveries. First, we got frustrated with the
limitations of the LCD screen and once again began trying to find a way—ANY
way—to hook things up to the television. Ultimately, I (Master of Black
Magic that I am) whipped up a spell to fix the problem: the powerful and
awe-inspiring FitRoundPegInSquareHole. In no time, we got the use of the
television back. But that wasn’t all that happened. Next, we
discovered a rather unusual bug. There Pokey was, in the middle of “Boom
Boom Dollar,” when suddenly the screen blanked out. The game kept going,
but no visual. We fooled with the pad and the console, and suddenly the
picture came back—except the dance floor had suddenly become a giant map of the
US with weather symbols. Apparently, Dance Dance Revolution has a hidden
“Weather Channel” mode. Curious, we fooled around a bit and discovered the
entire process for accessing it. And because you have been such patient
readers, we will now share that code with you.
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The Dance Dance Revolution 3rd ReMix “Weather Channel” code:
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If you did this correctly, you should now be able to play any song on a giant weather map. Check out this photo of us playing it if you don’t believe it.
The day before, hunger had prevented me from contributing to the giant capitalistic orgy that is the dealers’ room. But now, hunger was a distant memory. Twenty dollar bills and traveler’s checks were making my wallet groan in agony. Just the sight of otaku lugging around huge, full bags emblazoned with logos, and the sounds from the dealers’ room echoing through the entrance hall were making me drool uncontrollably (hey, there just aren’t that many places to buy anime and manga and the related merchandise in Peoria). And once I set foot in the exhibit hall—sweet, merciful God. Bombarded by the sights of mecha exploding and brilliantly costumed fans, inundated with the sounds of explosions and cheery voices singing in Japanese...I’m afraid I went a little spend happy. I’m not entirely sure what happened in the next hour or so, but the things I bought tell some of the tale. To recount some of my less explicable purchases, I somehow ended up with a couple of mecha model kits, three different Pokémon plushies, a Sailor Moon figurine keychain, and a Japanese manga that I don’t recognize and, of course, cannot read anyway.
At any rate, we were a bit late on getting lunch, so we
had to hurry back to the hotel to catch a much anticipated premiere. We
arrived about twenty minutes before the start time and found a crowd of people,
all eagerly awaiting this exclusive. The energy in the air was such that
it could have served as an alternative energy source for the state of
California. The tension was so thick, you would’ve had to cut it with a
diamond-tooth power saw. Before long, the video room doors were flung
open; the crowd of otaku that had been attempting to exit the room was swept
back in as a much larger and more frenzied wave of fans crushed their way
through the tiny doorway. Yet despite the already fully-charged
atmosphere, somehow the crowd’s energy continued to build, as empty seats
disappeared faster than free booze at an AA meeting. Then, out came
someone to start the show, and he was immediately inundated with deafening
cheers and shouts of “Get on with it!” After a brief introduction, he
retreated to the safety of outside the room, and the already painful decibel
level grew even louder as the flood of fan enthusiasm completely overwhelmed the
dikes of calm and sanity. Now only one thing could prevent the crowd from
inciting a catastrophic shift in the earth’s crust—the lights went down, and a
sudden, unearthly hush settled over the massed otaku, as if they had been muted
by an enormous remote control.
A single beam of light flickered to life,
illuminating the enormous screen. A few overwrought fans actually
screamed in ecstatic release when the logo of the animation studio
appeared. And then...the first images flicked across the
screen. Where once had echoed the frenzied chants of the fans now
boomed glorious Dolby surround sound emanating from two jacked-up stereo
speakers. The audience quieted at the moments of calm, roared at the
moments of action, and drank in the awe-inspiring spectacle of animated
film like a man in the desert greedily quenching his thirst at a cool
oasis. And then it was over—five minutes of sheer anime
ecstasy. And the crowd rose to its feet and gave the Vampire
Hunter D trailer a standing ovation that lasted longer than the entire
showing had. Five minutes of film—five spectacular minutes of
extraordinary animated film.
Tim: Speaking of things that lasted longer than the trailer, it took me a good hour or so to write those last two paragraphs. XD XD XD So what do you think? Have I got what it takes to be a novelist? ^_^How was it really? Umm, as good as a five-minute trailer gets. To its credit, it showed a lot of action without giving away the story. And the animation was simply awesome. So, if this means anything, I knew little of the story of Vampire Hunter D before seeing this trailer, and yet I’m definitely looking forward to this revamped version. What? Pun? Oh dear, not again... >;D |
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Luckily we got back to the room just in time to get ready to go back to the karaoke room—for Otaku Generation’s semifinal performance. XD Well, at least there was no chance of us getting lost or misdirected this time, I reasoned. So, we left the room and headed down in the elevator and were on our way to karaoke, when suddenly we heard someone yell out, “They’ve got free food!” This immediately got the attention of our group, as well as that of every half-starved otaku who had blown his or her meal money on Evangelion wall scrolls or a Trigun boxed set. Soon, a flood of fans (us included) was headed down to the Hyatt’s Rainbow Lagoon to partake of this feast. Well, not exactly a feast, but free food is nothing to pass up. And they had cakes—cakes bigger than a 22-inch TV. Yep, for this 10th anniversary party, they went all out, for sure. |
Of course, then we remembered the karaoke competition, so we gobbled up what remained on our plates and hurried off. Because none of us fancied the idea of going all the way back to the hotel lobby and then to the karaoke room, we decided there had to be a shortcut in back of the convention center. However, the shortcut that we took put us in the bowels of the convention center, a twisting maze of gray concrete and maintenance equipment. A land where no otaku had set foot. What to do, as strangers (emphasis on strange) in this strange land? What most people do when lost—keep going until you get unlost. So that’s what we did, and amazingly enough, it worked. Soon the concrete floor gave way to carpeting, and we were back in the familiar confines of the convention center proper. Fortunately for us poor misdirected latecomers, Otaku Generation was scheduled to go last in the group competition semis, so we got there in time to catch it. And what a semifinal performance they put on. In a nosebleed-inducing show, they stripped down to their sexy lingerie and worked the crowd like only a cabaret dancer knows how. The singing? Uhhh—I honestly don’t remember much about the singing. ^_^ Believe me, if you were there, the quality of singing was not what was on your mind, which may seem odd, given that it was a karaoke contest. Still, raw sex appeal obviously won over the judges, pushing the guys over the top and into the finals later that evening.
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[ Day 3 ] [ Day 4+ ] [ Miscellaneous ]
Disclaimer: This account contains a lot that could offend people. Sexual content. Drug use. Profanity. Violence. Celebrations of Japanese culture. Non-white people. Crudely drawn pictures. Sentence fragments. If anything in this account offends you, find another web page. If your kid reads something that offends you, tell them to find another web page. If you’re really ticked off by it, then e-mail me (cosmic_chicken@excite.com) so I can ignore you. Certain characters, events, etc. referred to and depicted in this account come from Japanese animated films and television series and are copyrighted by their respective companies. Whatever the SPJA and Anime Expo have copyrighted belongs to them. Text, original images, and image manipulations © Tim Kaneshiro.
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